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The Melodies.

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Sunday, September 12, 2010

Stay home weekends are productive.

At least I've cleaned my room, groom my baby, and packed my room as well. Yes, it has been a stay home weekend for myself. Let's just put it this way, I manage to ground myself, spending time doing things that I should instead of hitting the clubs like how I used to.

Hmmm, been thinking quite a bit these days.. I don't know, but I just can't help but to think a little these days. Ever since that day someone asked me "Are you happy?" all the way up till now, my brain has been working, doubly hard than usual. I felt lost when I saw that text, like really lost. LOL. Well, let's just put it this way, I'm kinda contented with whatever I have now - friends, family, and ok, work..

People told me, its time to let the past go and move on from there. My reply will always be a smile, and silence. I won't say I've like wow, 101% let go and I'm all ready to open up to the next, and so on. I mean it takes time for me to you know, rely on another. Of course, I must feel that the person is the right one, and that he's worth for me to open up myself to and so on..

I won't deny that, ya la, I'm scared. LOL. Yes, I'm seriously scared, like scared shit know, kinda scared. LOL. I don't know how am I gonna make the next work. I don't know how is it gonna even happen. I don't know if I can even you know, make the first move. I have no idea how can anyone confessed that he's feeling empty, but well, I gotta applaud him for that. There's no way I'll tell anyone that "hey, I'm feeling empty" even though I might be feeling that way. RAHS, I'm not making any sense, but ya, I know what I'm trying to say ( I do have ego, though its small, but I do have it, and ya, I do not open up to anyone, like easily. It takes a lot of efforts to prove it to me).

Well, I know, and I'm trying to like, slowly unbreak this ice around myself. Of course, the other gotta prove his worth before I do anything too. I'm not playing hard to get either, I'm just tying to observe, to see things carefully before I jump again.. Uh well... Again, people tend to judge, without giving you a chance to explain. Humans.....

I got confused when I stand and looked at you.
I got confused when you were so sarcastic, and got angry.
I got even more confused when you chose to ignore, and thats that.

`beautiful delusions_
9:58 PM


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